Giving good headline

Save the free word

Headlines are important because the brain needs the big picture delivered – in a very small number of words – before it decides if it wants more.

When I was in media, eight out of ten people read headline copy, while two out of ten read the rest. Our job was to get ten out of ten to read it instead.

These are a few headlines I wrote for general publications:

*Chicken stock heats up Wall Street. *Fish boosts brain. *Nuts lessen stress. *Dwarfs crash into neutron stars. *Gut microbes browse gene buffet.

These are a few I wrote for non-nudie men’s publications:

*Dress for more sex. *Size really does matter. *Best male sex enhancers. *Almost nude starlets. *More almost-nude starlets. *Your best hardest body ever.

These are headlines I sometimes made up for news I somewhat made up, too. *Frog croaks. *Horse kicks bucket *Dyslexic walks into bra

These are headlines I wrote for real stories the day before I acquired brain damage when I was hit by a truck. The last one gives me the chills. It’s in italics here.

*Your mom was right *Extra virgins *Etiquette for activists *Talking to God about religion *Right brain? A major global shift is happening inside our heads. The next day, my brain broke when I was hit by a drunk with a truck.

Post-truck, I couldn’t read or write. I couldn’t even say:

Please help, I am thirsty,

or

Please help, my feet are cold.

or

Please help, my lips are dry.

I could just point to my head.

Collage portrait by author of woman with head injury.

I lost my life. My first life. And got a new life no one would choose plus a mew broken brain no one would pick. Then I built back. That’s the point. We all get hit by something big. The diagnosis. The disease. The divorce. The death. And we can all build back.